The Silence of the Lambs

Sweeping things under the rug can lead to only one thing, a heavy heart harboring unnecessary toxins that will weigh you down and potentially kill you. No wonder you can't sleep, tossing and turning all night and all day; having all kinds of attacks: asthma attacks, heart attacks, head attacks, mind attacks. Until you ask the LORD to shake the spiritual rug of your life, and until you are willing to confront what you fear, stand up to what's got you hiding in secret, and what's keeping you in bondage like a caged bird, you will continue to suffer from those evil and nasty dust bunnies that have made your heart and mind their home. 

The enemy wants to make you feel like you are all alone in whatever you are going through. You are not and neither do you have to bear it alone. There are many of us that have gone through that dark pit you're experiencing. We, too, have camped by its fires and slumbered in its tight evil grip; having near death experiences of slipping and drowning in the Lake of Despair. 

Yet, I don't blame you. No, I do not blame you for refusing to open up. We have used the pulpits as weapons and sat in pews to tell your stuff. We haven't been role models and examples of godly and virtuous women. In fact, we've been mean and ugly, and at times, more vicious than the world. We've been snobs, turned our eyes, and held back our hands from reaching out to you. Your disconnection is justified. We've given you every right to feel the way you do. 

We added to your hurt when we made you believe that we had everything in our lives in working order and in check. That we had "perfect" marriages, "perfect" relationships, "perfect" ministries, and that we faced no struggles. We only showed you the best manmade masks of pretense and you bought it. We graced our heads with wigs and tracks of pride, that now, if you take them off, you would never recognize us. We laced our ears, necks, arms, hands, and feet with the shackles of glitz and glam in order to deflect the oozing pain flowing from our pores. We painted our faces to help diminish the wrinkles and scars; one that would project an illusion other than the “real me”. But it never lasted long because twelve o’clock always came, and by the time we got home, it would all be washed away from the water that fell from our eyes. 

Some of us did not do it because we were trying to be mean and ugly like the others; it was our way of surviving, yet, we did it anyway. Like you, we were scared too, and like you, we did not find the spiritual mothers to help us, to dress us, to teach us. Just like you, we were left to fend for ourselves, trusting no one with what we deemed precious to our hearts because there was no one to be found that could relate to our struggle, our pain. We were taught to pray with one eye opened, and while everyone was shouting from the rooftop “Be honest!”, NO ONE around was being honest and transparent enough to keep it real

So, why should you be transparent with anyone, right? Nobody is telling you, that like Job, they were living right before the LORD when their husbands and wives decided to get up and abandoned them. No one is giving you the raw and uncut version so that you could truly see that if it had not been for GOD's power and grace that intervened at the right time, they would have committed homicide, double homicide, and yes, even triple homicide. They have not dared to share that even as a woman or man of GOD, they had to fight with themselves to oppose, seemingly, what would have ended up a tragedy. Remember David, a man that the LORD called after His own heart, had Uriah murdered.

Nobody is telling you to look out for Oppression, Depression, and Suppression, and that these three are capable of sneaking into your bedroom unnoticed to rape and molest you until you are numb. Nobody is taking the time to take you by the hand to walk "this thing" out and help cast “this thing out”. Is there anybody there?

I know you haven't felt hurt, disappointed, and betrayed like when you've been hurt, disappointed, and betrayed by your own "church folk", because those who knew better and where suppose to do better, didn't. Like Jesus, when He was feeling abandoned by the Father, you have come to know what it is to cry out with a loud voice, “Eli, Eli, lama sabachthani? That is to say, My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?” (Matthew 27:46). 

The "Silence of the Lambs" syndrome ends when you get up and confront it with the resurrected power of Christ. You will not CONQUER what you are not willing to CONFRONT. Jesus wants to walk through the corridors of your brokenness. He wants to walk through the secret chambers of your wounded heart in order to give you the healing and deliverance you need. He wants to remove all those temporary dirty bandages you call your garment and pour out His healing balm all over you. The opportunity for you to be free from that which binds you has come. Will you let Him in? Will you allow the spiritual midwives He is sending to help?

Tilt your heart towards the SON!
Narda Goodson
Author, Will the REAL ME Please Stand Up!

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